Why is there a title to this last column of 2025? Typically, over the 8 years of writing this column, the last one of the year is sentiments about enjoying the spirit of the holiday season, making resolutions for the coming year, resources for getting help for yourself or for someone else in need, etc. This time, from personal experience of a life crisis that happened to me in the fall (we all have them and usually when least expected), I got lost for a while. On the outside, no one knew, but on the inside, I knew. What was I missing, and how would I find whatever it was? I found out it was JOY.
What is the definition of joy?
A deep, lasting inner state of contentment and purpose, capable of existing with hardship and rooted in gratitude or meaning; an underlying oxygen, a deliberate choice to find deep satisfaction regardless of external conditions.
What brings joy varies, but common themes are deep connections with loved ones, small daily pleasures (like coffee, nature, music), achieving goals, personal growth, acts of kindness, mindfulness, and finding purpose through supporting others or appreciating moments. It’s often about cultivating gratitude for what you have and embracing simple, meaningful experiences. The root of joy is gratefulness…it’s not joy that makes us grateful, it’s gratitude that makes us joyful. Very personal to me is the gratitude I feel for all my special friends, and even acquaintances, who reached out to me to help me find my joy again.
This column is to remind us (me included) that through all the ups and downs of 2025, the good times, the hard times, the unexpected times, losses, gains, life in general, there is always room to find joy in something around you and to let the joy guide you throughout all the other things that might get in the way. I found it in small pieces mostly – waking up to a funny good morning text from a friend, the sun is out, no rain or wind so don’t need my umbrella, being greeted on a walk by my neighbor’s puppy with full on paw shakes and kisses, finally completely a project, giving a smile to a stranger shopping at Fred Meyer’s and getting a smile back, helping someone with no expectation of anything in return except glad I did whatever it was.
You don’t have to hunt for joy, manufacture it, or figure out how to lead a stress-free “perfect” life (is there such a thing?). You can allow joy to live alongside whatever else you are experiencing. You can welcome it into the messiness of your life in every season. When life feels overwhelming, pause and look around for something that feels warm and comforting. Anchor yourself in something that brings you peace and joy. It could be as simple as the first cup of coffee in the morning or as amazing as a phone call (or text) from a long lost but not forgotten friend or family member that touched your heart. My life was really messy for a while, and I still get messy days, but I am so comforted by the joy and warmth received. I hope I pay it forward. And if you don’t have it, I truly hope you find it. Don’t ever stop looking – it’s there waiting for you.
Joy doesn’t have to be big to be real. The goal isn’t to fix everything. It’s to feel something. Start with one small thing – a deep breath or sunlight through the window. Let yourself pause without needing a reason. Hold on to one good thing at a time. You don’t have to chase joy – just notice it. It’s a process. Joy comes and goes but don’t forget it is always there and sometimes comes at the most unexpected times.
Most days, I am getting my joy back and quite honestly there are those days where I wallow and go why me? On the ‘wallow’ days I have a conversation with myself to remember all of the above. It’s not always easy but it’s doable. I am certainly not saying that every day is, or should be, perfect with no highs or lows and filled with flowers and chocolate, because that is not real life. What I can say if any of the above resonates with you – start looking for your joy if it is lost, continue your joy if you already have it, and maybe help someone else find their joy – reach out and touch someone and maybe they will reach back and touch you. That is JOY. For 2026, I wish you:
12 months of happiness
52 weeks of fun
365 days of smiles
8,760 hours of good health
52,600 minutes of good luck
and
315,600 seconds of JOY.
The Tualatin Aging Task Force, and your Aging in Place Column authors, Bev and Susan, thank you for your support of seniors in our community and look forward to continuing our path and progress together with you in 2026.
